Your time will come.

It is very easy to look at the lives of others and assume.

Hi guys,

Hope you’re well. I’m doing okay, Alhamdulillah. 

As some of you may know, I got married to the love of my life last weekend. Alhamdulillah robbil alameen. 😃

Marriage is an interesting thing. On one hand, it sometimes seems to me as no big deal. If I already know that I want to spend the rest of my life with person xyz, then shouldn’t it be easy to make that official in the eyes of God and man?

On the other hand, the numerous traditional x family x legal processes that are involved with committing to spend your life with someone in this part of the world can be exhausting. And just thinking about the stress is enough to cause a review, “Am I really ready for all this?”

Well, I have no answers for you. I do however think that marriage is an important institution, and whenever the time is right (your time, not your friends’ or family’s time), then the process is definitely worth pursuing. 

If you are a Yoruba man considering it, then I can tell you two things for free:

1. It is not your wedding! You can try your best to express your wishes, and everyone will genuinely listen to you and try their best, but it is not your event at the end of the day. Know this and know peace. 😂

2. You will receive so much support! Everyone from your immediate family members to friends you haven’t heard from in forever will show love, sacrifice, and affection in more ways than you can imagine. After spending the last few years getting used to the relatively individualistic nature of oyinbo land, I was (and still am) overwhelmed by how much support we have received over the past few weeks. 

Alhamdulillah robbil alameen.

Now let’s get to today’s post.

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I recently visited the University of Ilorin and passed by the Engineering building sponsored by NLNG, Nigerian Liquefied Natural Gas Limited. 

For such an impactful company, NLNG is relatively lowkey. The Nigeria LNG company was instituted in 1989 through a joint venture between the Nigerian government (NNPC), Shell, Total, and Eni to produce liquefied natural gas for export. Having been fortunate enough to work briefly in Nigeria’s oil and natural gas industry, I have to hold myself from explaining the previous challenges with gas flaring, the increasing importance of gas vs oil to Nigeria’s economy, and just how much we can achieve if we get things like NLNG right. It is also worth knowing that NLNG has (mostly) had phenomenal success, and has given the Nigerian government about $120 billion in revenue since 1999.

But I digress. 

Earlier this year, I read a memoir by NLNG’s former CEO, Babs Omotowa, ‘From Storeroom to Boardroom: How Integrity and Courage Shape Global Business’.

Babs’s story is very inspirational, from growing up in Ilorin to becoming a Global Vice President at Shell International, where he oversaw climate change, environment, process, and personal safety for 40+ countries before taking ‘early’ retirement after 26 years with Shell-affiliated organizations.

Babs Omotowa - Image from JarusHub

While Babs’s story is generally worth reading, the focus of today’s newsletter is slightly different. 

Between his graduation (1988) and Shell job offer (1993), Babs waited 5 long years. I want you to ‘deep’ this.

So many of us graduate now and look at our classmates, neighbours, and friends who seem to be moving at a faster timeline. Some of them may have gotten jobs with Goldman Sachs or Bloomberg in the United Kingdom even before graduation and relocated less than 3 months after convocation. Others might have gotten fully-funded PhDs and left for the US right after NYSC. Others have raised VC funding and are working on their startups in Lagos and Ibadan with seemingly endless pots of money to dip into. And on and on and on.

It is very easy to look at the lives of others and assume that it is a straight path for everyone. 

But Babs’ story reminded me:

1. That my time will come. As my friends continue to have news worthy of praise, I will stand up and celebrate until it is my turn to be congratulated. And in the meantime, I will keep working (e.g. Babs working first as a secondary school teacher in Ilorin and then as a Commercial Officer with Nigerian Security Printing and Minting Company in Lagos) and praying until it is my time. 

2. That it is okay to switch paths, regardless of the time already invested in my current path. Every once in a while, an opportunity comes my way that will require me to transition from my current interests. The vast majority of the time, I ignore it. I tend to see these things as distractions and instead double down on what I’m focused on. But I am learning that the current path is not always the best path, and sometimes it is necessary to forgo the sunk cost to begin a more rewarding journey. 

As you begin a new week, I hope these thoughts provide you as much benefit as they have to me

Eyan mi, your time will come. 

** Jara content:

Malik bin Nadlah said,

I came to the Prophet (SAW) wearing old clothes. So he said to me,

“Do you have any property?”

I said, “Yes.”

He asked, “What type?”

I said, “All types - camels, sheep, horses, and slaves.”

He said, “If Allah gives you wealth, then let it show on you.”

Have a great week. ✨