#Lite: May your delay be beneficial

Hopefully in time you find it to be true.

Hi guys,

Hope you are well. I’m doing okay, Alhamdulillah.

I write this at 5:26 am on a cold Sunday morning, not the best of times to be honest. I had slept at about 9 pm, hoping to be up at 2 am to do this. E no work lol. For some of my friends (most notably Oghena), they can just stay awake all night if they feel the need to get some work done.

I have always been different. My body is like a child - to get it to do what you need, you give it something it wants first.

Like this.

Me: Hey it would be great to get some work done tonight. Are you up for it?

Body: No.

Me: But it’s really important. Please.

Body: No.

Me: Sigh. What do you want?

Body: Sleep.

Me: Yes we'll sleep later I promise, let's just work for a few hours first.

Body: No.

Me: Okay, how about I give you some sleep now and then you work for a while?

Body: How many hours sleep?

Me: 4 or 5.

Body: Then how long do I work?

Me: 4 or 5.

Body: And I sleep again after?

Me: Yes I promise, at least 2 hours.

Body: Okay I’ve heard.

And sometimes (like last night) it still doesn’t work. 😂

** update: I paused when it was Fajr time and ended up jumping from one thing to the other for the entire day. It's 8:13 pm now and I am forced to make this newsletter much shorter than I initially intended aka #lite. Ah well.

—————

A few days ago, I was complaining to a friend about how there appeared to be zero progress on something I had been waiting for, when she said something that struck me.

"May the delay be beneficial."

When I read that message, I paused.

I don't think I had ever received one quite like it. From the numerous times I had previously received reassurance after ranting to my family and friends, I typically got messages like,

"E go dey alright my G. Try no put mind for am."

Or, “May Allah ease your affairs bro, barakallahu feek.”

Or, “Really sorry to hear that fam, things will be better soon I promise.”

But never, "May the delay be beneficial."

I realized that many of us see delays and challenges as (un)necessary roadblocks, things we need to get past in our 'journey to success', or for religious people, a 'test from God'. As such, the type of reassurance we give ourselves are usually focused on either (1) being patient x striving through difficulty, or (2) praying for a better time in the future.

Almost never do we think about these delays, challenges or setbacks as potentially being for good. But more times than not, after sufficient time has passed, we look back at the problems of yesterday and realize that they were indeed beneficial.

Maybe a terrible heartbreak made you single (and available) to meet your spouse.

Maybe a job loss helped you figure out that you had a passion for community development.

Maybe a visa rejection for further studies eventually opened the door to a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity back home.

Or maybe your problems are still very much present, and it is seemingly impossible to picture them as positive experiences in any way.

I say to you what she said to me, and hopefully in time you find it to be true.

May your delay be beneficial.

** Jara content:

As at 2006, Randy Pausch was a Professor of Computer Science at Carnegie Mellon University and one of the foremost experts on human computer interaction and virtual reality on the planet.

At just age 46, he had already been lecturing for about 20 years and had also worked with Google, Disney, EA, Xerox and Adobe. Then in 2007, the unthinkable happened. Randy was told he had 3 to 6 months to live.

Like the teacher that he was, he delivered one final lecture - Randy Pausch Last Lecture: Achieving Your Childhood Dreams to a packed hall at Carnegie Mellon. It is 1 hour 16 minutes of life lessons and 74.83% guaranteed to make you tear up.

Image from Independent

Strongly recommend :)

Have a great week. ✨